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| Even though she was physically weak, Daniel's grandma exemplified strength to him better than any other person. What is strength to you? |
What is strength to you?
Daniel Hensley | 1/31/08 | Opinion
hat is strength to you? Is it how much you can bench press? Is it how many of your friends you can pick up? Or is it something deeper inside? Or is it something that keeps you going even when you know you can’t win? Something that allows you to fight in spite of the fact that you know you’re going to lose? Strength can be both physical and spiritual, and sometimes it can be both.
Marilyn Neel, age 69, died of cancer on the morning of Friday, January 25, 2008. She fought for close to seven years before finally being overtaken by the multiple forms of cancer that had infested her body. She refused to take pain meds until the day she died. The day immediately preceding her death, the medics who were monitoring her condition gave her a morphine drip for the pain that she denied having. She fought with the spirit of a true Scandinavian valkyrie, refusing to admit weakness even when it was evident to everyone around her. She refused to allow the cancer to have any satisfaction in their endless waltz.
Rebecca “Becky” Jansen, just shy of 65, died of cancer on June 15, 2007. She had been diagnosed a year earlier with stage four cancer that had infested her bones. Until the night she died , she refused to acknowledge that the cancer might kill her. To her, it was simply not an option. When around her, we weren’t allowed to think that she might have trouble with it either. Positivity was the name of the game for her, and she used that positivity to fight with every last breath she had. She refused to become depressed because the second that she did become sad for herself, the cancer would have the gratification of knowing that it broke her spirit.
When my Grandmother Becky passed, it felt as though all the positivity in the world had left with her. It felt as though the sun was nothing but a black hole. I didn’t want to get up in the morning for a while. Then, I realized that she wouldn’t want me to feel like that. She would be the first person to try and amend my thought process to something positive. I still feel her around me every time I choose optimism over pessimism. Because of her and her constant positivity and outlook on life, I was able to deal with the passing of my other Grandmother. Because of Becky, I was able to love the fact that I had known my Grandmother Marilyn and love that she had fought so valiantly.
I no longer look at death as a loss.
For those of you who have loved people fighting cancer, for those of you who are fighting cancer, be positive. Let it not be said that you did not fight ’till your last breath! Do not allow negativity, because as soon as you do, you allow the cancer one more stab at you. For every person that has died, there are many more still fighting. Each one is fighting for not only themselves, but for all victims of cancer. Those that have survived cancer, those that have spit in it’s face and walked away victorious, should be seen as a beacon of inspiration.
No one is alone in this war with cancer. Every person we come in contact with is a potential ally against the psychological weapons of cancer. The strength to win is deep within you, and deep within the people around you. You are loved. You are true heroes. You are the inspiration for the rest of us in this world to be strong in the face of every hardship.
To those of you who have fought cancer, to those of you who have loved a cancer victim, to those of you who have died of cancer, I love you. I love you as I would a family member whom I have grown up with. You are all my family.
And to those of you who died fighting, give my grandmothers a hug for me.
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